WWA Inception 2001

World Wrestling Allstars Proudly Presents...

WWA Inception 2001

Welcome, cats and kittens, to yet another installment of the only reviews to be banned nationwide in Uzbekistan, Cewsh Reviews! We have a special treat for you tonight, as we return for only the second time ever to the magical and distant land of Australia to cover the debut show of World Wrestling Allstars, WWA Inception 2001! Now you would certainly be forgiven for having never heard of WWA before, as it was never very well known in the United States, but imagine a promotion stocked to the gills with former WWE, WCW and ECW talent, running the same year that WCW ended, and booked entirely by TNA's Jeremy Borash. Yeah, exactly. What resulted was perhaps the wildest and most disparate combination of talent ever combined into one promotion, and would prove to be the spiritual predecessor to what we now know as TNA. What ALSO resulted were some shows that make most Aussies double over with laughter if you even mention them. So with all of this talent, and away from the corrupting influence of WCW, what could possibly make these shows so laughable? Well I will serve as your loyal fact finder to find out.

So without any further ado, let's do a motherfucking review!

To Be Continued »

WWF Royal Rumble 2001

Cewsh: This is the end result of a contest we ran on Rajah.com to determine which Royal Rumble we would review based on reader votes. I think this one won by about 40% of the vote. Apparently there are a lot of Honky Tonk Man fans out there.

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The World Wrestling Federation Proudly Presents...

WWF Royal Rumble 2001

Welcome, cats and kittens, to yet another installment of the court jesters to the rumble royals, Cewsh Reviews!  We have a special treat for you tonight, as we review the Royal Rumble!  Ah, ah, ah, not so fast.  Not THIS year's Royal Rumble.  That comes later this week.  No no, tonight we go back in time and review what some consider to be the very greatest Royal Rumble ever held, WWF Royal Rumble 2001.  Consider this a warm up for our review of the whole shebang itself, and to make sure we're up to tip top Rumble reviewing shape, i've summoned the Rumble monster from his tomb early and will be unleashing MichaelC on the unsuspecting populace in a continuation of what we are now calling The Royal Week of Rumbles.

Now then, let's focus in on one of the most beloved shows in WWE history.  We have all the Attitude Era greats at their peak here as they catapult down the road to Wrestlemania 17.  Steve Austin is a desperate man, the Undertaker and Kane have united to lay waste to the world and the Rock is out to prove he's the top man in WWE.  Along the way there will be bowling balls, an unexpected Hall of Fame entrant and a whole lot more.  So what the hell, free the chains on MonsterC and let's get this rampage started.

So without any further ado, and on behalf of our awesome reader Don, let's do a motherfucking review!

To Be Continued »

WCW New Blood Rising 2000

Cewsh: This is my favorite review. If you're reading through the archives and you find another review that I've said is my favorite review then forget about that one, because that's Future Cewsh's favorite, and that guy is almost always drunk.

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World Championship Wrestling Proudly Presents…

WCW New Blood Rising 2000

Welcome, cats and kittens, to yet another installment of the time traveling, whirling dervish we call Cewsh Reviews! Tonight we have a special treat for you as we set the clock back to the year 2000 to take in the splendid aroma of WCW’s New Blood 2000 PPV. Now we’ve traversed these dangerous waters before, with our review of WCW Superbrawl a few months ago, but WCW at the end was something that can’t be summed up in just one installment. Oh no. To do a decent reckoning of the biggest train wreck to ever contain the words “professional” and “wrestling” (not necessarily in that order) we had to go back and give ourselves over to the sheer experience of Vince Russo’s mad whims. 12 matches? Why not?! Two KroniK matches? Bring ‘em on! Judy Bagwell on a pole? YEA…wait, what? Seriously?

Fuckhumping McJesus. What have we done?

So without any further ado, let’s do a motherfucking review!

To Be Continued »

WCW Slamboree 2000

World Championship Wrestling Proudly Presents…

WCW Slamboree 2000

Welcome, cats and kittens, to yet another installment of the only reviews that time travel more that Doctor Who, Cewsh Reviews! Well here we are again, in the hallowed halls of World Championship Wrestling about to imbibe some of the most controversial wrestling ever committed to film. In past installments of these reviews we’ve seen everything from a stable of insane clowns to a guy who thinks he’s Prince, to an MMA fighter who was a member of a boy band, and in between they even found some time to do some wrestling.
Going into this show, David Arquette is your WCW champion. I know. I KNOW. The main event will feature he, Jeff Jarrett and Diamond Dallas Page engaging in a triple decker cage match just as in the movie, and while Deewun only has to deal with 2 hours of a disgrace to wrestling, we’ve signed on to 3 hours of WCW booking before we even get to that. I can only assume we’ll get our reward in the afterlife. But that’s for then and this is now!

So without any further ado, let’s do a motherfucking review!

To Be Continued »

WCW Superbrawl 2000

Cewsh: We could base this entire blog around just reviewing WCW shows from 2000 - 2001. Actually, I don't know why we haven't already done that. It's not like they're going to sue us or anything.

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World Championship Wrestling Proudly Presents…

WCW Superbrawl 2000

Welcome, CATS AND kittens to yet another installment of the consistently prefaced Cewsh Reviews. Tonight we’re playing the part of Doc Brown, and we’re strapping you into the DeLorean and setting the dial to the year 2000. There was so much of interest that year, as we narrowly dodged the Y2pocalypse, boy bands ran rampant all over our collective faces, and we elected George Bush, or didn’t, depending on who you ask. However, since we run a wrestling review ditty here, we’re going to zero in on something we can make fun of, and if we’re talking jokes, we’re talking WCW in its final year.

We’ve plucked this random PPV from their last year open as a company, just to be a window in to the often discussed downfall of WCW. Was the quality really so bad as people always say? Are there really 12 goddamn matches on this show? Which of us will have an aneurysm from laughter first? Only one way to find ouuuuuut…

So without any further ado, let’s do a motherfucking review!

To Be Continued »

WWF In Your House: Breakdown 1998

The World Wrestling Federation Proudly Presents...

WWF In Your House

Breakdown 1998

MichaelC: So, a long, long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, an event even more shocking than Disney buying Star Wars occurred. That's right. Cewsh challenged me to a bet over the Royal Rumble result (Cewsh Note: He picked Sheamus, Barrett or McIntyre, I picked everyone else on the entire roster. It seemed like a solid bet at the time.) And failed miserably. As a result of my victory, I got to cash in a Review on any subject over the course of the next 12 months. It could be on anything. Kennel from Hell! Bread Eating Matches! Something TNA related! The possibilities were endless. Hell, I could have even gotten him to review the whole 10 hour Youtube version of "They're taking the hobbits to Isengard". (This actually exists!)

I'm Not Going To Tell You What To Do, But Seriously, Click At Your Own Risk.

To Be Continued »

WWE Wrestlemania XIV

Cewsh: This is the first classic show that Mrs. Cewsh had ever seen. After having seen it, she spent weeks genuinely perplexed as to what people see in nostalgia at all.

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World Wrestling Entertainment Proudly Presents...

WWE Wrestlemania XIV

Hola everyone, instead of your usual Cewsh, you’re getting me, Ms. Cewsh, popping my Attitude Era cherry to bring you another lovely review. While some girls get dinner and dancing on a Saturday evening, I get a Wrestlemania from elementary school and Smirnoff. That’s right intrepid readers, Cewsh and I are on board for a pre-Mania review of…Mania! XIV, that is. Picked by a complex algorithm involving my kills in Fallout, Cewsh’s diet soda intake, and the Wrestlemanias we already own, we've selected a show neither of us had really seen. This’ll be fun. Right?

To Be Continued »

WCW Starrcade 1997

Cewsh: Fun fact! This is our most popular review from the first year of Cewsh Reviews and it contains no pictures whatsoever. 

You'd almost think that this show had some kind of controversial ending or something.

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World Championship Wrestling Proudly Presents…

WCW STARRCADE 1997

Welcome cats and kittens to yet another Wrestlemania-month installment of Cewsh Reviews… Part of Mania-month is our attempt to review the biggest event of every major wrestling company. We did the NJPW show, Wrestlemania 14, HUSTLEMANIA, TNA’s Destination X (the Wrestlemania of shitty shows), and now we have what is arguably the biggest and most important show in wrestling history. Sting vs. Hogan. The signing of Bret Hart. Everything was banging on all cylinders for WCW, and the company had never and would never be hotter than on this night.

Cewsh has never seen much WCW, and Vice hasn’t watched it in years and years, and when we read this card we eyed it rather dubiously. But we’re going to give it a whirl and see what we think, and see if we can answer a few questions. How will WCW’s biggest show turn out? How does it all stand up viewing it today? Will I contract Attitude Era Syndrome and drool over Bret Hart promos? Only one way to find out...

To Be Continued »

WCW Bash At The Beach 1996

Cewsh: We've covered a lot of historic events here at Cewsh Reviews, from Hogan vs. Andre to that time that Stacie Keibler had wrestling's first mid-match miscarriage. But among all of the great moments, this is perhaps the most important, so you know we had to cover it eventually. Adding to the fun, though, was that it was the first time either Mrs. Cewsh or I had actually seen this show. So our thoughts here are those of two people watching history unfold for the first time.

But mostly we just remember the crab camera.

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World Championship Wrestling Proudly Presents...

WCW Bash at the Beach 1996

Welcome, cats and kittens, to yet another installment of the historically relevant Cewsh Reviews! We have a special treat for you tonight as we plunge headfirst through the endless voids of time, emerging unkempt yet stoic in the fine year 1996. And oh, what a spectacular view it is. In 1996 Braveheart won the Academy Award for Best Picture, that whole OJ Simpson thing happened, Boris Yeltzin became Russia's first president, some dudes cloned a sheep and the pop charts were ruled by the Spice Girls and the fucking Macarena. And now we have traveled back to this magical year in search of another historical moment that helped to define 1996 in the minds of millions of wrestling fans around the world. July 7th, 1996 to be exact. The day the New World Order was born. A moment that has been written about time upon time upon time. But tonight is different. Tonight, it will be reviewed by two people who have not only never seen it before, but who have only a passing relationship with World Championship Wrestling in the first place. So get ready for the formation of the now, and indeed, for all of WCW in 1996, tackled from a different perspective. If nothing else, at least i'll finally have a chance to use this:

WEEP FOR THE FUTURE YE PERILOUS SOULS.

So without any further ado, let's do a motherfucking review!

To Be Continued »

WCW Uncensored 1996

World Championship Wrestling Proudly Presents...

WCW Uncensored 1996

Welcome, cats and kittens, to yet another installment of the only reviews that are still wondering what the criteria for a promotion being "championship wrestling" is, Cewsh Reviews! We have a special treat for you tonight, as we take one of our too rare trips back in time to the days of the ancient WCW dynasty to review WCW Uncensored 1996. Now, if you've seen this show, you probably know exactly why it is that we are going to be reviewing it here today, but if you haven't, you are in for an incredible treat. For this show might contain the most preposterous match in all of wrestling history. I won't spoil the surprise, (and hands off Wikipedia you spoilers,) but believe me when I tell you that the match in question has so much insanity associated that I won't even be able to list the people in it without bursting out laughing. And that's just one match! Who knows what the rest of the show may have to offer in these wild and legendary days before the fall of WCW. Will we see classic matches given 5 minutes? Will we see more mullets than a Billy Ray Cyrus house of mirrors? And will I be able to get through the main event without laughing to death? There's only one way to find out.

So without any further ado, let's do a motherfucking review!

To Be Continued »