TNA Lockdown 2013

Total Nonstop Action Proudly Presents...

TNA Lockdown 2013

Welcome, cats and kittens, to yet another installment of the only reviews that have their own special room in the psych ward for when reviews go wrong, Cewsh Reviews! We have a special treat for you tonight, as we induct another show into the 5 Times Reviewed Club, namely TNA Lockdown 2013. Now we have had a long and sordid relationship with TNA over the years, as you well know. We've laughed, we've cried, we've cried more, we've thrown shoes at tvs, it's all very melodramatic. And last year we made the decree that we would only review the major TNA events because the product had become virtually unwatchable. TNA has obliged us by cutting their PPV schedule down dramatically, but this is still the first time that we've visited the house that Jarrett built in a good long time. And the last time we visited, (TNA Bound For Glory 2012,) it was probably the angriest review that we have ever done. But hey, 6 months can change quite a bit. So let's see what we've got here. Jeff Hardy as champion. Lethal Lockdown match featuring Eric Young as the dangerous wild card. Aces and Eights. Brooke Hogan. Chavo Guerrero. Okay. Um, right. Shit. Well, hell, let's just go for it and hope for the best. After all, if TNA has proven one thing again and again, for better and for worse, it's that they always have the ability to surprise us.

So without any further ado, let's do a motherfucking review!

To Be Continued »

7 Reasons Alberto Del Rio Should Stay Champion

Hey boys and girls. As we roll on toward the glory and splendor of WrestleMania, I'd like to take a moment to focus on a match that is being kicked under the carpet a bit in the lead up to the event. I'm talking about the WWE World Heavyweight Championship match between Jack Swagger and Alberto Del Rio, and more specifically, I'm talking about how and why Del Rio should retain his title next Sunday, against the powerful forces of Dr. America and his sidekick, The Mustache Kid.

Warning: This Man Is Not A Licensed Doctor Or Country.

I'm going to hit you with seven reasons why Alberto Del Rio should not only retain the title at WrestleMania, but should go right on holding it on into the future. And no, his dazzling smile didn't even make the list.

(This article was previously seen on Bleacher Report. It has been altered from that version.)

To Be Continued »

NJPW Wrestle Kingdom VII

New Japan Professional Wrestling Proudly Presents...

NJPW Wrestle Kingdom VII

Welcome, cats and kittens, to yet another installment of the only reviews that take 2 months to get Japan and back, Cewsh Reviews! We have a special treat for you tonight, as we travel back to Japan for what has become easily the second largest and most significant event of the wrestling year, NJPW Wrestle Kingdom VII. Over the past few years, New Japan Pro Wrestling has transformed itself from the least rotten apple in a rotten bunch of Japanese promotions to I don't even know man. Some kind of super apple? An apple stuffed with diamonds or something? I'm not Dr Analogy, guys. Anyway, New Japan has been on a roll completely unmatched by any wrestling company since the Attitude Era, and now we've come to their version of the Rock vs. Steve Austin at their version of Wrestlemania. Yeah, it's that on. Okada and Tanahashi are going to meet tonight in one of the biggest and most important matches of this decade. But hey, that's only one match on one of the most stacked cards of the year. Want to see if this is all just empty hype? Well then read on, boys and girls. You won't be disappointed.

So without any further ado, let's do a motherfucking review!

To Be Continued »