Here there be spoilers.

If you are new or looking to AVOID the spoilers, go here now.

Unfortunately, due to the nature of reviews, there are spoilers inside all the cuts. Don't want them? Turn around, do not pass go, do not collect $200, and click the pretty link at the top.

If you ignore this and read a spoiler anyway, don't come crying to us. We did warn you.

If you are looking for the archive of past episodes of Cewshcast 5000, you can find it here.

April 29, 2012

The 5 Best Feuds From Before You Were Born

Welcome, cats and kittens, to yet another Sunday Supplement from your glorious benefactors here at Cewsh Reviews Headquarters.  Tonight we're going to be dealing with something a little different, and rather than turning back the clock to when we were teenagers or when we were kids, we're going to turn the clock all the way back to when we weren't anything at all whatsoever.  See, its a common fallacy of people to only really regard the things that have happened in your lifetime as important, and not to factor in things that went on before, and wrestling is no different.  If you think back to the days before Hulkamania it probably seems like sort of  a big empty period of random title changes and aimless matches, but there were storylines even back in those barbaric times when nobody had started wearing codpieces yet.  So today we'll be celebrating the 10 best storylines that took place before we were born (using 1985, when I was born, as a frame of reference).  Maybe we'll learn something that will give us all new respect for the old timers who paved the way for the wrestling we enjoy today, and if not we can at least all look at how weird people looked back in the day.

Either way, its time for an adventure and off we go!

April 27, 2012

TNA Lockdown 2012

Total Nonstop Action Proudly Presents…

TNA Lockdown 2012

Welcome, cats and kittens, to yet another installment of the only blog that has a fully grown Sasquatch on staff, (he types like 75 words per minute,) Cewsh Reviews! We have a special treat for you tonight as we return to the scene of past crimes against wrestling to review TNA Lockdown 2012. It has been 3 months now since we elected to stop covering TNA’s PPVs on a monthly basis, and now we’re checking back in to see how they’ve been getting on without us. From the looks of things, everything has gotten real interesting in the TNA universe, with Bobby Roode running roughshod over the entire company as TNA champion, Bully Ray lovingly renaming himself Calfzilla, and with the Immortal Hulk Hogan having taken over as the man in charge on television. After alienating us with dreary booking before, will they be able to make us come crawling back begging for forgiveness? Or will we finally have to call things off with TNA permanently? Only one way to find out…

So without any further ado, let’s do a motherfucking review!

April 6, 2012

WWE Wrestlemania XXVIII

World Wrestling Entertainment Proudly Presents…

WWE Wrestlemania XXVIII

Welcome, cats and kittens, to yet another installment of the always delightfully insane Cewsh Reviews! We have a special treat for you tonight as we finally come to the conclusion of the wrestling year with the single biggest event in professional wrestling, WWE Wrestlemania 28. This year WWE seem to have outdone themselves with stars aplenty and feuds galore. We’ll see two of the biggest names in wrestling history do battle to decide which is the bigger star, two legends duke it out to end an era, and two smark love affairs collide. There will also be a Kane match. This, along with all the pomp and circumstance implied therein, can be yours for the low low price of simply continuing to read after this paragraph is over.

Still with us?

Good. Because not only do we have the big show, (also The Big Show,) to consider, but we’ve rounded up the classic dream team of Cewsh and Vice to tackle it, as well as a very special guest viewing her very first ever pay per view. She’s seen the days of Wahoo McDaniel and Ric Flair, she’s perhaps the Rock’s biggest fan on this or any planet and hey, she gave birth to the greatest wrestling reviewer on the planet. I could only be talking about Mama Cewsh making her reviewing debut, and we have not told her anything about anyone on this show, so it’s all first impressions. Boy oh boy does she ever have some opinions to share. So lace up your boots and queue up your music, because it’s time for the show.

So without any further ado, let’s do a motherfucking review!